Thursday, January 7, 2010

Public Service Announcement

Yo, people need to stop droppin' the deuce at work! I don't know who it is exactly but I have my suspicions about the guilty party in my office. We have two bathrooms and every day I have to pick my poison when I need to take a tinkle. The one on the first floor is usually the worst. I've actually improved my lung capacity due to the severity of the situation. I'm like a damn Navy SEAL now. I can hold my breath for like 2 minutes. Straight up.

I don't see how people can come to work and blow up the bathroom EVERY day. Really? What the hell are they eating? Whatever it is they need to stop. Forever. I should go to my boss and propose we reinstate the use of outhouses. These disgusting deuce droppers should be made to go out there whenever they want to handle their business and the rest of us are spared the horrible gassing.

There's nothing worse than going to wash my hands after lunch and damn near upchucking my food because the smell is so bad. Stank ass mofos.

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